As we begin 2022, may now more than ever we all be more AUTHENTIC with eachother! And may you find friends who call out the GREATNESS in you! 🤩

Have you ever felt a FIRE inside you to be crazy transparent? But been completely terrified of what that means?

I get it.

That was me before I wrote my book. Being THAT vulnerable was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But now on the other side, I’d do it again in a heartbeat…because it’s been the BEST thing I’ve ever done for what it’s helped do, for others.

The stories. The lives. I wish I could tell you them all. And they’re still pouring in.

But what I want to tell you today is more of that authentic journey.

Consider this a SNEAK PEEK to ‘Book 2’.

With that said; here’s the story…

Back at my recent coaching training something epic happened. Two COURAGEOUS friends, were I believe placed beside me that week not only to have FUN, but to feel safe, process further and be hit by what I was hit with in order to keep RUNNING forward leaping over the obstacles that can continue to be placed in our paths. They inspired me, loved me, prayed over me, and continued to call out both directly and indirectly the deep desires of my heart but SAW what He had placed inside of me to do and helped continue to bring it forth!

I watched one of these two friends - April Brown - lead our whole training, SURRENDERING so much, do HARD things and COURAGEOUSLY inspire us to “take the mask off”.

Why? Because “authenticity is our greatest asset. It’s not easy, but it’s simple” – AB.

That in sharing the pain, the ugly, the mess ups, and the imperfections that we truly help people! That we have to SURRENDER in order to give our clients what we want to…and what do I want to give YOU?

My AUTHENTICITY!

I can’t change your life for you. But in being authentic with my own, maybe, just maybe, some portion of it will inspire YOU that you too can overcome really HARD things!

So what am I being authentic with you today on? Well…

I’m 38 years old, single, and there’s many reasons that has been my journey. One of them is because of my internal battles.

I hate labels. So in sharing this, it’s NOT to put any label on myself. It’s to be transparent with my struggle. Why? Because we all struggle. And what I don’t want is for that person out there who is struggling to think they are alone. That it will never get better. Or that it will not ever become clear.

One part of why I have struggled is because of same-sex attraction.

What is my label? My label is “I have battled it out with my God”. And that journey is one of the most heart-wrenching, raw, and beautiful journey’s I have been on. A journey I had kept a mask on with and with my book…it came off!

It came off because I know there’s people out there who feel alone, and I care more about that person than I do about what anyone may think of me.

I know who I am. Running, harder, faster, and falling more in love with my Creator is the only reason I’m at where I’m at today.

A place of PEACE. A place I never thought I’d ever get to.

If you’re struggling, I get it. If you don’t know the answers, feel confused, or trapped, I understand.

Lay it before the Creator's feet, no matter WHAT it is! – simply TELL Him where you’re at. You don’t have to know the answers. And I’m not here to give you any. Or even give you mine.

Let Him lead you. He WILL light the path!

A coach doesn’t lead a team to a WIN without knowing His players. YOUR Coach, your heavenly Father knows YOU! He knows you better than you know you. Lay it at His feet, you WILL get there. You WILL win. And you WILL get to a place of total PEACE.

And that peace, that peace I have now friend. I wouldn’t trade anything for it. ANYTHING.

And I would never want to go back to where I use to be. Feeling absolutely STUCK, and that I would be confused, and trapped forever.

Friend. Take the mask off before your Father!

Live life fearlessly! There is nothing I want more than more of HIM.

I could cry and probably will as I now write this next part, but the second friend mentioned above - Jacqueline Yaich - had gifted me with something incredibly thoughtful at the start of the training week. It’s thoughtfulness perfectly & poetically matched her and her husband’s impact on my life already…how do I mean? Because His timing with them both, had been perfect, powerful and brought so much LIGHT! He had been up to much already with their entrance into my life and I knew He was up to even more in it’s gifting.

The gift? A T-shirt (the one I’m wearing) in celebration of who she saw, a “Beautiful Badass”. There’s too much to the meaning behind it to share now, but I can’t even describe how SEEN, and celebrated I felt, for who I was. For who I was designed to be. And how much I saw HIM in it’s gifting.

Later in sharing why she bought the WHITE one specifically saying she’d normally buy black but felt like it represented where I was right now…coming more into the LIGHT. I was finding MY answers. I was finding my Peace. I was finding MORE of Him!

Later that day, no joke, I was sitting amidst another session and I get a buzz on my phone. The “verse of the day” from my Bible app…and what pops up??? …”Therefore Yeshua spoke to them again, saying, ‘I am the LIGHT of the world. He who follows me shall by no means walk in darkness but POSESS the LIGHT of life!”. …….I immediately thought of the shirt, why white was chosen, and I was stunned at it’s timing on my phone. The timing of this shirt. The timing of these friends in my life. And the timing of Him. I saw it all.

As the week continued to go by, these two friends watched me BATTLE the desire to be even more authentic, as it was as if Yahaveh was taking a gavelin and swinging it right into that SPOT I needed to both feel it and hear it because He knew that’s what I wanted to do more than anything!

Continue to be AUTHENTIC with YOU!

As I battled, I shared this very post with another coach in attendance. Who in sharing it I knew they didn’t battle with the same things I did but they simply asked me how my week had been, as I shared it, and she BURST into tears. He was telling HER to take off the mask about something completely unrelated as I read it!! I immediately saw what was coming with being even more authentic.

Which is part of why I’m here today, sharing all this. That verse that had popped up that day on my phone – John 8:12 – was yet another nugget in the trail of the treasures on the map that was unfolding that week.

Later this friend shared more about the context behind the verse - how the passage comes from the story of the woman at the well and how much opposition there even was for that chapter of the Bible to even be in there! I learned they were questioning even IT’S authenticity to be in there at all!!

How crazy is that for how many people can relate to this woman’s journey. And all that she was carrying?!! And how alone she felt?! But what happened in that space and how Yahaveh (God) made her feel SEEN. He knew the moment in her journey when and where to engage with her. He didn’t rush her to that moment. He knew when and where she would be ready to let a little more LIGHT in, to all the darkness she felt. What GRACE in love.

And it hit me…

How tragic would that be if THIS woman’s story wasn’t in there?
What an INJUSTICE that would be for all the people who have been able to relate to her - and to their God!
What an INJUSTICE that would be if we too REMOVED the authentic parts of our own stories??
What an INJUSTICE that would be if we stayed silent about them?
What an INJUSTICE that would be for our own freedom?

So that is why I am sharing all this with you TODAY.

Be bold friend. Be fearless. Be YOU! Be that BEAUTIFUL BADASS inside of you!

And allow grace for yourself in the process. When you’re ready to take another step towards more authenticity, I am ready to CHEER you on!